Is it Ok to be Friends with My Ex?
- Jordan Doll
- Feb 8, 2017
- 2 min read
So a relationship didn't work out... maybe the two couldn’t see eye to eye, or maybe someone in the relationship made an unforgivable mistake and there’s no going back.
What if you dated someone for so long that you can’t fathom life without them, so friends are cool, right? Either way they are your ex now… or for now.
Is it ever ok to be friends with your ex? (Let's explore with the help of Rachel and Ross from one of my favorite shows, Friends)
I don’t know, you know. What’s done is done. The person couldn’t make it to the future, so why bother? What if this is in the plan? Yeah, good luck telling anyone in love those lines. In a breakup there’s always an uneven heartbreak. Usually, someone’s ok with the friendship and the other is either too angry to be around the person, or too sad in love to be anything less than their significant other. Sometimes it’s just best that the two part ways. So can you befriend an ex? Yes. And no.
In some cases, a relationship could have stemmed from a deep friendship but it didn’t work out, so maybe the friendship is better between the two. Hey, we gave it a shot, but that wasn’t the move. Will the friendship ever be the same? Who’s to say, it’s only as awkward as you make it.
What about someone who you were deeply in love with and went through a tragic break up? Can you ever look at that person again as just a friend? Is that even possible? Initially, no. From my experience, I always think I’m ready to be an ex’s friend, but then I learn that I’m not.
When your feelings are still involved and when there’s no closure it can be extremely difficult to be someone’s friend. Think of it as a friendship, would you be able to smile and laugh with your best friend if you knew they were being shady behind your back? It’s the same with actual relationships.
So maybe friends isn’t the best move. Down the line, maybe a friendship will come along but I mean way down the line – not a month, maybe 6 months or much later. In some relationships though, the couple has to let the whole relationship go and not even think about friends. Some relationships can be toxic and a cancer to you so it’s best to leave it in the past.
Live life,
Jordan
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